I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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