I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
