I don't think brook has ever known best
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize
