Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
