i was born a porn star she said
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
