I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Mom said you looked used
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
