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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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