But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize