it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
