You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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