I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
