she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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