There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
