No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
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