If i come over, it means nothing
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
