More tranny stories later!
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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