Dual....:-)
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
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