I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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