This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
