I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
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