You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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