there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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