Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize