Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
