it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
