I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
