and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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