I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
