The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
