Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Randomize
