how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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