Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
