I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
