Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Randomize
