He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
