I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize