you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
