Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
The ass gains better be worth it
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