Dual....:-)
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
