Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
Soap is not a condiment
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
how drunk are you?
Several
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize
