So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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