Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
