I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
