I think scott just propositioned me for sex
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
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