They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Randomize
