I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
i just made my gag reflex go away.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
