I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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