so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize