why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Randomize
