i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
