There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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