I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
so let's talk penis.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Randomize
